Marys and Garys
by Fate no Ito
Summary: My favourite characters from Naruto, Fullmetal Alchemist and Detective Conan are just relaxing when a Mary-Sue and a Gary-Stu show up and ruin their fun. Shows my anger at MS and GS. Please RR if you hate them too!


AOU: Dammit. I was scanning the Detective Conan section and what do I see? Mary-Sue and Gary-Stu stories EVERYWHERE! So, because I am so pissed, I am mixing my three favourite animes together and creating this Mary-Sue and Gary-Stu bashing fic.

Neji: at least we're not being bashed

AOU: All my favourite characters will be in here. Conan, Haibara, Ed, Sasuke, Neji, Haku (revived), and Tayuya. That is all

Tayuya: yay?

AOU: I do not own Fullmetal alchemist, Detective Conan or naruto

FIC START

Everyone from my favourite anime were grouped at the Survival Enshu (Survival Training) Ground in Konoha Village. Suddenly, a girl with undoubtfully big breasts, long blonde hair and big blue eyes walked forwards. She was dressed in a hot pink spaghetti-strap, jean shorts, a long blue-beaded necklace and had the hippest high-heels. Behind her was a boy with puffy brownish hair, dark green eyes and a coolness that rivaled Sasuke and Neji's. He was dressed in a black t-shirt and jeans with skateboard shoes.

"Who the hell are you?" Sasuke asked bluntly and rather harshly too. The girl looked lovingly at Sasuke, Neji and Conan. "My, aren't you cute? Well?" She flounced around for a bit and looked at the boys a bit expectantly.

"...Um, what?" Haku asked, shifting a bit. The girl's giant blue eyes went even wider and she gasped dramatically. "What? You are not stunned by my beauty? How come you're not asking me to be your girlfriend?"

"Well, besides the fact you're annoying and ugly, I can't really think of another reason." shrugged Conan. Neji nodded silent agreement.

"What's your name anyway, you bitch? You come during our break and start demanding we ask you on a date. What's your problem." snapped Neji, his white eyes narrowing rather dangerously. The girl's lip trembled and she exclaimed.

"Why, I'm Mary-Sue! The hottest, richest and most wanted girl ever!"

"You're wanted alright." Conan chuckled. Mary-Sue brightened but her face fell when Neji snorted with laughter, "Yeah. You're wanted at the loony bin."

The whole group chuckled softly. The boy was more focused on the girls than the boys. Of course, otherwise he would be gay! And no one would want their oh-so-perfect made-up to be GAY! He went up to Tayuya and Haibara, holding out one hand. "Will you go on a date with me?"

Conan immediatly bristled, and jumped forwards, knocking the guy's hand away from Haibara. "Hey! Keep your hands...or hand...off my girl!"

Haibara blushed and Tayuya blinked her hazel-red eyes. "My name is Gary-Stu and any girl I like likes me back!" He snapped immediatly. Haibara raised an eyebrow and pushed a lock of coffee-gold hair behind her ear. "Well, I hate you, Gary-Stu. I'll NEVER go on a date witha bastard like you." she turned on her heel and stalked closer to where Conan was, making the Meitantei blush a bit.

"We're both smart, you know." Mary-Sue screamed, backing to where Gary-Stu was. Gary-Stu put an arm around his 'girlfriend' and yelled, "Give us any question and we'll answer it!" Everyone grinned evilly.

"Okay," shrugged Conan. He pushed up his glasses before shooting out his first question. "What's the last thing Sherlock Holmes's said at the end of the first novel?"

"Um..."

"How many Divination Strikes are in my Hakke abilities?"

"Er...14?"

"no."

"How many atoms are in a kilogram of oxygen." Haibara asked. The answer is, like, super complicated and I will have to go downstairs, put on the video player and re-watch Teen Titans to know. So! No.

"Er...23?"

"no."

"How do you play G flat on the flute?" Tayuya smirked, tugging out her flute and shoving it into the unlucky couples' faces.

"No idea."

"What is the basic law of alchemy?" asked Ed, grinning and folding his arms.

"Er...draw a circle?"

"Uh...that's what you normally do to tap into the alchemical forces..."

"Who is my brother?"

"Sasuke the Second?"

"What is the name of my kekkeigenkai's ougi?"

"No idea."

Silence. Then, everyone laughed their heads off. "SUCKER!" sneered Ed. Everybody turned on their heel and walked away, leaving the dejected couple to sort out their answers.

AOU: I'm finished! And I am still mad! Why! I'm gonna get some coke...I need sugar to calm myself...gee whiz, I'm still in elementary school and I'm acting like a secondary person...


End file.
